It's the final countdown

And now an annotated addition of the famous song by Europe where even the footnotes have footnotes.

We're leaving together,                 (me and my ego)
But still it's farewell                       (to reality (in favor of my own), about as persistent as throat cancer really)
And maybe we'll come back,        (Someday, but for they moment I'm enjoying my gumdrop castle while cackling maniacally)
To earth, who can tell ?                (Or earth, whatever)
I guess there is no one to blame    ('cept Nixon)
We're leaving ground                    (More in a metaphorical sense, though I would like point out this is a 100% natural, non-drug induced high, excluding Japan itself)1
Will things ever be the same again? (Yes!)

It's the final countdown...                (As opposed to the not-quite-final countdown and the this-ones-for-practice countdown)

We're heading for Venus                (We mean Venus, Texas known as Gossip prior to it being confirmed that people actually want to live in Texas (those poor, poor bastards). Though it is the opinion of this blogger that if your town "boasts" a population of 910 then one should not call attention to fertility issues. Editor's note: the opinions published herein are those of the author alone and Blogger.com by no means wishes to imply that the citizens of Venus are Texans  infertile.)
and still we stand tall                      (Me, 6'4'' My ego: defined by s^x where s is the maximum size science is capable of measuring (s>1) while x is there to is there to to represent current state of awesome (x>1) and to make me giggle like a school girl when I say the equation out loud (s to the x))
Cause maybe they've seen us         (They, quite an ambiguous term, allow me to explain, no there is no time, let me sum up: Administrative Command, Amphibious Forces, Pacific Fleet Subordinate Command or ADCOMSUBORDCOMPHIBSPAC)
and welcome us all                         (I will not make a joke here as I have nothing but respect for our sea forces, as I myself have contemplated naval affairs on many occasions)
With so many light years to go        (Light year: a normal year who has been watching it's girlish figure
and things to be found                    (Been playing hide and seek with Jimmy Hoffa. The dude is really good at this)
I'm sure that we'll all miss her so.    (No, Jimmy is not a woman. He did, however, spend a few years in prison which, as you might imagine, led to gender lines blurring)

(Repeat chorus and steep until the proper concentration of awesome is reached)

1: Japan should note be taken in doses exceeding 100 milligrams and never more than twice a day. In case of accidental overdose, please contact physician. Know side effects include: naruto headbands, obsession with children's card games and believing that saying daisuki (love) and kawaii (cute) equates with being Japanese

Friends, Romans, countrymen. Lend me your corvettes. No? No one? Well it was worth a shot. Anyhoo, I'll be leaving land of the rising sun in about 2 days. So here in nostalgic celebration is those pictures I promised you around two months ago (again, blame Nixon). Here I present to you Spring Break 2011 with someone with better hair than Carson Daly (have you looked at me? I'm fabulous).

First, I'd like to thank all the beautiful women in my life.

There's her

And everybody loves a blond

Not everyone can pull off canary yellow, but she makes it work

And who could forget these hot young firecrackers

And lest we judge only on appearance (you chauvinistic pigs, you), remember that each of these fine young damsels are from Tokyo University, the Harvard of Japan. That means they will grow to be tomorrow's respected and dignified leaders.

My team that kicked ass and took names in the competition which you readers have forgotten about and which I won't bother to explain 

An delicious barbecue. You'll not that, as I and the rest of the people around the grill are distracted by the camera, Akio (the craft devil to my left) takes advantage of the situation and heads for the choice morsels.

The guy on the right is Kiba, our director whenever the teacher isn't around. Kiba is a chemistry student who happens to have his own anime alter-ego

Now for those of you who can't read Japanese (Philistines!) the cat is saying "I am Mr. Kiba". What's interesting to note that instead of ending with the tradition -san (mr.) it ends with nyan which includes includes the Japanese cat's onomatopoeic "nya". That is the English equivalent of "meow". To understood the subtleties of this particular linguistic phenomenon one must view it it amongst its contemporaries such as the one here. Apologies on the quality of link, but historical artifacts are rarely properly maintained.

Here are a few more of our illustrious leader's alter ego.

So, yes, the choir is every bit as manly as you imagined it.

In recent news I took a break for two weak due to catching ill. The doctors said it was kimatsu testo syndrome. It has been known to strike young people around this season. This illness is characterized by a number of both physical and psychological symptoms. Examples include: heavy sweating, shaking, the inability to focus, procrastination, the shunning of society and screaming at the sight of the word bug spray spelled out in kanji. If you want to do your own research on this illness you will probably have more luck finding it under its English name of "final exam" syndrome.

I would like to take this time to define the machine "puri kara" or "pretty colors" in relationship with Japanese society. Their American equivalent has been seen at Amusement parks around the states in the form of those little photo booths that girlfriends drag their boyfriends. Once inside, the male of the species may employ several defenses against this emasculating ordeal such as the looking "badass" or at the very least "uninterested". These defenses, however, do not work when applied to puri kara. The machine automatically airbrushes your skin and tints your lips the perfect shade of whipped. Additionally, it artificially enlarges your eyes anime style which only emphasizes the "deer in the headlights" look the males are no doubt sporting. Why do I bring this subject up? No reason. There are absolutely no incriminating pictures of me that will see the light of day. No  sir!

So yes, my days in Japan draw to a close and now I must bid a fond farewell to all the friends I made. This will be the last post on this particular blog so I hope you enjoyed. Maybe I will start another one to due with law school. Maybe.